I think we should start referring to historical figures with absurdly grand titles by the most prosaically literal translations we can come up with. Like, “Charlemagne”? “Carolus Magnus”? Fuck you, your name is “Big Chuck”.
Jesus Christ? You mean Greasy Josh?
“Jesus Christ” is an especially fun one because while yes, it does work out to “Josh, who has been anointed (with oil)”, if you chase down the etymology, khrīstós – and hence christ – more properly refers to the act of rubbing, without reference to the substance that’s being rubbed on. Thus, you can make an argument that “Jesus Christ” is most literally understood as “Josh, who has been rubbed”; I have no idea how to render that into modern colloquial English, but this is Tumblr – I’m sure we have an idea or two.
Head-Pats Josh.
(via stormy-poet)









